Relationship

This is going to be a long winded entry. Be prepared. ;)

For the past 5 years in secondary school, I have never been in a relationship with anyone else. I was wondering, is it because of my mom who told me that I cannot have a boyfriend until I finish my SPM that I didn't have one or is it because I am not the type of girl that needs a guy at this stage. Whatever they can do, I can do.

I have been single for a very long time and part of me wants to stay this way while part of me doesn't want to. I know this is ridiculous. Any normal girl (I think) would probably have an ex-boyfriend or a few ex-boyfriends by the time they are eighteen but I do not have any. I am NOT gay for goodness sake. 

Obviously who we date now in college isn't going to be our future husband, what more to say the guys we date in secondary school? I think this is why I do not want to waste my time on guys who are insignificant to me in the future. When people ask me why don't I have a boyfriend, I honestly do not know how to answer. I will probably need to think for a while before telling them that I have high standards for a guy, which is partly true. I do have high standards for a guy I would want to date. 

Criteria for a (Xian's) boyfriend: :D
1. He must know how to dance.
2. HE MUST BE SMARTER THAN ME.
3. He must be older than me.
4. He must be taller than me.
5. He must be fit and sporty.
6. He must speak perfect English and likes Maths.
7. He must have a sense of humour and is half as loud and crazy as me. :P
8. He must have a soft spot for animals.
9. He must LOOK GOOD.
10. He must be a gentleman and knows how to respect women.
11. And the list goes on and on...

This list is not completed yet. My guy MUST fulfill all the criteria above. I am picky alright. :) Just so you know, most guys I know who are smarter than me cannot dance and most guys who can dance are not smarter than me. I am making life hard for myself, but who cares? :]

Explains why I do not have a boyfriend?

Having no boyfriends before has its down too. I do not know how to talk to a guy that I like (mostly my crushes) and to act normally! Is it normal to have this i-don't-know-what-to-call-it feeling whenever you are talking to your crush? Well I do and it has made life so much more difficult for me. Once I think I have a crush on someone else, everything that I do will be awkward especially when he is around. UGHH. I've never been in a relationship before so I don't really know how this boy-girl thing works. I honestly don't know how to solve a relationship problem. I am the last person on earth that you will want to seek relationship advice from. 

At some point in life, I need to know all these. It is 2:25am right now and I am going to sleep first. This post shall be continued. :)